Small gods, hardcover/terry pratchett

The thirteenth Discworld novel.

Just because you cant explain it, doesnt mean its a miracle.

In the beginning was the Word.

And the Word was: Hey, you! This is the Discworld, after all, and religion is a controversial business.

Everyone has their own opinion, and indeed their own gods, of every shape and size, and all elbowing for space at the top.

In such a competitive environment, shape and size can be pretty crucial to make ones presence felt.

So its certainly not helpful to be reduced to appearing in the form of a tortoise, a manifestation far below god-like status in anyones book.

In such instances, you need an acolyte, and fast: for the Great God Om, Brutha the novice is the Chosen One -- or at least the only One available.

He wants peace and justice and brotherly love.

He also wants the Inquisition to stop torturing him now, please.